Why Ralf denied my offer and will still stay in jail


I am more than convinced that there is something which is named suncream. But, because of one of my biggest weakness, maybe i thought that i am stronger then the sun. I am not. Look to that picture and you will see that i burned myself that much yesterday when i start cycling from Bangkok in direction to the south. But another weakness that could also be a strength helped me through half of the night (writing this article it´s 3 AM): i do not feel that much pain, when i am hurt.


However, after 109 km on the road i was lucky again. Found a 500 Baht (12,54€) room in Ang Sila quite opposite to the beach and a lot of small nice fish restaurants.


So my day was kind of successfull. It was not that difficult to find out how to leave Bangkok by cycle. Did it almost on the old Nr. 3 Highway. Like sometimes before i decided to leave on a sunday morning, because there is not that much traffic inside and outside the city. A lot of Thais used the day for a picnic with their families in the recreation areas or went fishing. Got invited some times, when they saw me cyclng along.


Had only a black coffee in the morning before i start my tour and took lunch at 3 PM. A big dish filled with rice and same prawns for 80 Baht (2 €). The rest was more or less relaxed cycling. Never expected to do more then 100 kms on my first day.


"But why not - Coconut ?" like the nepalis say...;-)


Back to Ralf who is still in Bangkok´s IDC prison.


After Ralf denied to accept my offer to pay him the flight back home to germany, which is the only thing that prevents him to leave the jail, i decided to give him my E-Mail-adress. I told him that my offer will be valid till the end of mine or his days. He appreciated that, but in the next moment he said: "i will write you an e-Mail when i am off of jail...". So it sounds like he will not change his mind...


After that we started talking about the jail life.


Who is still in.

How the situation is.


And he told me that he was moved to a smaller room with less space (!).


Not to imagine for me, because when i was "in" 88 people shared a room with 90 square meters, three toilets and a 3 meter water bassin for bucket shower.


I could really see and feel like he opened himself during our chat. I offered him money so he will got the chance to buy some pineapples, chicken wings, nuts or apples from the flying traders. These guys are allowed to go in front of the cells and sell food to the prisoners through the cell windows.


That was the only food i ate during my time in jail. Therefore i left IDC prison last year march with 80 kg body weight.


Two weeks before, when i was arrested, it was 89 kilos.


I mean, three times plain rice a day with a little bit a kind of a cucumber sauce that doesn´t sounds like Paul Bocuse is cooking there, right?


When i felt everything was said, we shook hands and went in different directions.

Ralf back to this "room", we went back to the office of Miss Apple to discuss further ongoing steps.


We also discussed why he denied my offer and came to the conclusion that there might be two or three possibilities.


1. Proudness / Disappoinment


He told me all the time, even 10 months before, that he was cheated by a former business partner and friend and he is still waiting for getting money from that guy. That means he will probably stay in jail forever. Strong reason because of proudness. But dying in jail because being to proud on one hand and disappointed of humans or friends on the other hand?

Possible, but very strange.


2. Mentally insane.


I don´t think so but i am not a doc. In my opinion he exactly knows what he is talking about. He also remembers my plans and asked how successfull my year was. Asked me what i am doing here in Thailand and why i am visiting him.


3. Fear of future.


It´s very hard to say or to write. But i also remember, that after a few days in the IDC Prison i thought by myself:


"Everything fine and safe. The only bad thing is, that i cannot open the cell door and went out if i want. But twice a week THEY open the door and i can leave my room for an hour. So, not that bad..."


One of the most outstanding abilities of human beings is to try to arrange yourself with the given situation just for one reason: to survive.


Mentally and physically.


Maybe Ralf has big doubts about his life after IDC prison.


What to do when he is deported to germany by plane? Arriving there with no money, no support, no friends, no relatives...simply with nothing.


How to setup your life more then ten years after you have left that piece of earth temporarily named germany?


Still a lot of questions are open.


However, Justin and me decided to get one guy out of that damned place named IMMIGRATION DETENTION CENTER PRISON where you have to die just because there is nobody who loan you 600 € for a flight back home. Even not your own Embassy.



We name ourselves civilized? Pah!


We´re not! Specially some more and more people in germany. What´s wrong in their brains and mainly in their hearts?


They think they know what it means to be refugee or being illegal?


As long as we leave people in prisons like the IDC in Bangkok because a guy does not have 600 € to fly back home and as long as a embassy of a country like germany is not willing to give a credit about 600 € whe cannot name ourselves "civilized".


We have money for weapons and wars, for big cars and all that fucking bullshit but not for human beings?


We name other cultures, countries and people "barbaric"?



I was illegal. 

Caused by others.

And i was just lucky to have friends and relatives who helped me to get out of that hole.


Not more and not less.


Just lucky.


Others do not have that luck. They might have to die...


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